My family left for Utah to look for a home and I’m chilling with my aunt and little cousin at my grandparents’ beach house. We’ve been coming here since I was 8 and it’s filled with memories!! My older brother and I would bike to the pier everyday and buy candy and soft serve ice creams or bike to the next pier and blow our quarters at the arcade. We’d spend hours jumping over waves and digging our little hands in the sand to find the biggest sand crabs. We’d watch the sunset from the lifeguard towers and pull on the locks of the tower doors to see if we could peek inside. When it grew late we’d make s’mores over my grandma’s fire pit and wait until there wasn’t a soul on the beach so we could play sardines and hide behind the large, rusted blue dumpsters and under the lifeguard towers.
I’m sitting by myself on the patio writing this, enjoying the wind blowing through my hair and the comforting sound of the waves, and feeling nostalgic. It’s exciting to grow up and gain new privileges, like dating, driving, independence, etc. but sometimes I wish I was a kid again. Wonderful were the days when you could play from dawn until dusk without a care in the world! Maybe I’m just feeling nervous about how much is ahead of me and all the big decisions that are in my immediate future. Maybe I’m just wishing for the comfort of being a child, when the biggest decisions you’d have to make were what you’d wear for the first day of school. I don’t know what I want to do with my life yet and it’s a little unnerving that I don’t know where I’ll be, not just in 10 or 5 years, but 2 years! As I go off to college and enter into adulthood and a period of transition, I may be leaving my childhood behind, but I don’t have to leave the child I was behind; she’s inside and she’s braver and more courageous than I am. Maybe she’ll help me through!
I love this kid. Enjoy your childhood, Goose.